what it does for you


Forgiveness is a powerful force. It enables communication, heals wounds and resurrects relationships, among other things. 

But it's terribly misunderstood. 

Some equate forgiveness with weakness. They think that not forgiving shows strength of character, pride, and conviction. Not only will they not forgive, but they will also constantly remind themselves never to let it happen again. The transgression against them becomes their guiding light. 

Some think that forgiveness is for holy people - or for those who have not been hurt too much. They think in terms of degrees. The less you hurt, the easier it is to forgive. The greater the pain, the longer you're entitled to hold on to resentment.

Some reject forgiveness altogether, because they think that forgiving means that you have to pretend that whatever happened never did. 

Still others say that they forgive, and remind you of it every chance they get. Their kind of forgiveness has a price, which can never be fully paid.

Forgiveness seems to be a big sacrifice.

However, the truth is that forgiveness mainly benefits the one who forgives.

Consider this:

By not forgiving, the negative emotions that you feel turn into poison in your body, and cause all kinds of ailments, even fatal ones. Remember that whatever you feel affects you, not somebody else. 

However, by forgiving, you expel the poison from your system, like a good spring cleaning. Once the poison is gone, the healing can begin. 

When you look at it this way, you see that by forgiving, you do yourself a favor. Forgiveness is necessary for your own good, because the same energy that you would otherwise use hurting yourself, can actually be used to heal yourself, and, if you wish, others as well.

Forgiveness is a metamorphosis from victim to healer.

The process is both emotional and logical. It's not necessarily easy, but it is possible.

The first step is to face your pain, however hard that may be.  Then, you look at the logical reasons why you have to let it go - in other words - forgive.

The logical reasons are easy to identify. As soon as you face your pain, you feel different things. Maybe your heart beats faster...or you have trouble breathing...or you shake. Do you know how damaging that is to your system?

Now, consider this: all these things will stop when you forgive.

The added bonus is that forgiveness not only cleanses you, it also makes space for wisdom.



More on forgiveness coming soon...

Wishing Only Well,

Carmen Colombo

April 2002


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